I'm sitting here with a cup of tea in hand, listening to slow instrumental music, waiting, dreaming and thinking. My sons 9th birthday is in two days. We are celebrating it with a good size group of 14 little ones ready to break out in a nerf war. As I'm sitting here in the quiet day, relaxing with my own thoughts, I start pondering how fast time has gone. It seems like just yesterday we were bringing home our son for the first time, just yesterday we were watching him give the army crawl eventually making it to his knees and bulldozing whatever was in his way, just yesterday we watched him play his first baseball game... just yesterday...just yesterday...
As I wait for that special time of honor in the quiet, stillness, of the house, I get to reflect and dream. 9 yrs has gone so fast. I reflect on all those special moments we've had together like sitting together learning to read and when he finally gets it rejoicing with him. I reflect on playing hours of baseball in the big backyard of Virginia. I think of the times we played miniature golf in the house on New Year's Eve and the times we stayed up late trying to look at the stars with his new telescope, only to fail at our hard efforts. I remember times of hurt and pain that my own selfish ambitions have caused and times of sorrow during animals deaths and daddy's departure. I remember times of struggling together and rejoicing together. I cherish these times, the good and the bad. I want to keep every moment and every memory alive so we can tell our grandkids and they can tell their grandkids while making a legacy for the Williams family. He is part of a legacy that will live on and I can't wait to see how God will use this amazing young boy, my son, to encourage and build His kingdom.
As I sit here feeling the warmth of the tea in my hands and smelling the sweet scent of a candle, I'm also dreaming of his future. Not just what I want for his life and educational goals but dreaming a dream for a much deeper future, one that will touch many lives. One that will encourage and build other's for Christ's sake. I dream that God will use my boy in such ways to challenge and change others for His glory. When I dream this I also pray for wisdom and trust in our sovereign God who has promised to take care of him and use him as He sees fit, releasing my boy to a God who is bigger and more powerful than anything I could ever accomplish. When I dream I have to put all trust in something bigger and better than me. I cannot make this boy into the man I dream he is to become, but our God can. Releasing my sweet 9 yr old is no easy task, but the more I see who God is and His love for us, the easier it is to let go. I pray I will trust our Lord more each day in the task of building my boys character and making him the man he is to be. I love you my boy, and pray you will never know of a time you didn't trust in something bigger than yourself.
